Saturday 28 July 2012

Saturday 28 July 2012 - PNFS again

We're off again. A letter from the trustees this morning informed Dave that as the LPC and officers meetings were to be combined, there was no longer a role for him on the LPC, therefore please return the keys. This peremptory demand was dressed up with compliments about the amount of work he had done for them, patronising till it dripped. The anger this engendered in Dave powered him for 12 miles non-stop over Bleaklow at a pace I could hardly keep up with. But now, turning to poison by feeding on itself, and by half a bottle of wine, the fury is turning against me for what he perceives as negativity. 'So you want me to hand back the keys, say nothing, roll over and let them kick me in the stomach?' I point out that walking away might be the most fitting and dignified way to treat an organisation he says he holds in such contempt. Whereas answering back would be likely to give Rogerson further reasons to present him as a troublemaker; none of the officers would support Dave as they would not want a return to the disputes of the winter; and he would end up doubly humiliated. D wants to provoke Rogerson into admitting he wants rid of him for purely personal reasons. I say that is obvious and he would gain nothing. On the other hand, D isn't the sort to walk away, and may not have much to lose by writing to the trustees offering his services in other capacities. Or, as I suggested, enquiring coldly and curtly whether they would have the courtesy to explain to him the reasons for the changes.

Tuesday 24 July 2012

Monday 23 July 2012

Catherine has heard at last from Sheffield University, with an email saying they would be offering her a place after all. Family and friends all reacted wuth relief and congratulations, but Catherine seems underwhelmed. She absolutely does not want to go straight on to more studying and the prospect of more screwed-up social life, with its fevered campus expectations, in September, and is determined to spend 8 months with CSV, hopefully as teaching assistant or similar, where she is more likely to make a positive practical contribution to real people's lives. She is also talking of a year as au pair in America as well, but i think (and hope) that she will want to get on with something a bit more directional, ie degree/professional training, by next summer. Once the formal offer comes via UCAS, she will need to write to Sheffield about deferment. I haven't lost hope of TCD, though she seems to, and everything may yet change again.

Wednesday 11 July 2012

Wednesday 11 July 2012

C has had to contend with blow after blow. First she was unexpectedly called in for her hernia operation on
Thursday 5 July, due to a cancellation. The op[ was quick and she was sent home at 2pm, feeling rather peculiar but with very little nausea. When the anaesthetic wore off the pains returned, in different parts of her belly and also down her leg, but so did her colour, appetite and argumentative attitude.

Then on Friday the IB results came out. She was nervy, but expectant. What nobody expected was that although she got 36 overall, an excellent mark, she only got 5 in each of her Highers. Disappointment floored her - that after two years' consistent hard work and high grades, and after beating her brains out since April to learn everything and after lasering all her learning and intellect into the exams themselves; not to speak of needing 6 in French for Sheffield and lord knows what else for Dublin, none of this effort or ability was reflected in the results. At least, that's how it felt - compared to most people's marks her 36 was a great result and it seemed peevish to be dismayed by it. She did feel better after talking to Geoff and Gillian on Monday - Gillian showed her the breakdown of marks, which showed she had only missed a 6 in both French and English by 3 or 4 marks; and Geoff said Sheffield were very likely to offer a place anyway, especially with the help of a letter from him pointing out her other achievements, and the standard of the IB compared to A-levels (36 would be translated as A* A* A A according to KWC). Whether they do or not, we are thinking about whether to apply for re-marks, in the hope of pushing up to a 6. It would be good to have her ability and hard work recognised, and maybe increase the chances of TCD after all, but sometimes C thinks it would be better to try and accept she got what she got and isn't as clever as she hoped she was; and I want to be sure I'm not pushing for a re-mark  out of vanity or wounded pride.

This body-blow came on top of the tiredness and aches and pains and general unwellness that have dogged her for weeks and the effect was to completely knock her out - a wall of fatigue falling on her each day. I didn't think this very surprising, but C just felt rotten and being told her blood count was clear and everything was down to stress only made things worse.